THE BRIDGE WE NEVER NEEDED

You know what’s fascinating?

We keep building bridges between people…

…and then congratulating ourselves for solving the problem of the gap.

Men and women. Black and white. Gay and straight. Tall and short. Fat and thin.

Left and right. This team and that team. Vaccinated and unvaccinated.

One political tribe against another.

People who believe this.

People who believe that.

People who think something is right.

People who think it's wrong.

And apparently we are now getting to the point where you need a committee, three acronyms and a laminated flowchart just to introduce yourself.

“Hi, I'm Alessandro.”

“Wonderful. And what are your preferred—”

“Mate, I'm just saying hello.”

😂

Here's the thing.

I'm not interested in telling you what you're supposed to believe.

I'm interested in asking you:

WHO TAUGHT YOU TO BELIEVE IT?

There's a very simple metaphor I keep coming back to.

Imagine a jar.

Inside the jar are black ants and red ants.

They're not fighting.

They're just… ants.

Doing ant shit.

Walking around.

Getting on with their day.

Then you shake the fucking jar.

The ants become agitated.

They don't understand what's happening.

They look around.

And suddenly the red ants appear to be the problem.

So they attack.

The red ants look around and think:

“Those fucking black ants started it.”

So they attack back.

And while they're busy destroying each other…

nobody is asking:

“Who shook the jar?”

Now forget the ants for a moment.

Look around.

How many of the things we fight about every day are actually important?

And how many have become important because we've been repeatedly told that they are?

That's the dangerous part.

Not having an opinion.

Having an opinion you have never examined.

Not having beliefs.

Having beliefs you haven't checked since you were twelve.

Not belonging to a group.

Believing you must defend the group at all costs.

Because once your identity becomes attached to a label, questioning the label can feel like questioning yourself.

And that's where things get interesting.

Because you can build a cage…

put a beautiful fucking sign on it saying:

FREEDOM

…and people will happily walk inside.

You can call separation:

“Inclusivity.”

You can call conformity:

“Acceptance.”

You can call obedience:

“Safety.”

And if the words sound nice enough, people stop checking what they're actually doing.

Here's another funny thing about bridges.

A bridge is built because there is a gap.

So when we proudly announce:

“We're building bridges between these groups!”

I sometimes wonder:

Who decided there had to be a fucking gap in the first place?

Maybe the person standing next to you didn't need to be categorized before you could relate to them.

Maybe you didn't need to know their political affiliation.

Their sexuality.

Their skin colour.

Their vaccination status.

Their fucking football team.

Maybe they're just a person.

Maybe you can disagree with someone without needing to turn them into an enemy.

Maybe you can love someone without agreeing with them.

Maybe you can challenge someone without hating them.

Maybe you can recognize someone's humanity without making their identity the most important thing about them.

Because you are more than a label.

So am I.

And the moment a label becomes more important than the person wearing it…

we've already lost something.

This isn't about pretending everything is perfect.

It's not.

People can be cruel.

People can discriminate.

People can make fucking stupid choices.

But if I punch you in the face, does the punch become more or less stupid depending on the colour of your skin?

If I lie to you, does my sexuality make the lie more ethical?

If I betray you, does my political affiliation make the betrayal acceptable?

No.

A stupid choice is still a stupid choice.

A cruel behaviour is still cruel.

A good behaviour is still good.

Maybe we should start judging the fucking behaviour again.

And you know the uncomfortable part?

They don't have to control you.

They can let you do it yourself.

All they have to do is give you a label you become terrified of losing.

Then you will defend it.

Protect it.

Fight for it.

Build your entire identity around it.

And eventually…

you will make life-changing decisions based on assumptions you have never bothered to question.

That's the real trap.

Not someone telling you what to think.

You becoming unwilling to think outside what you've already decided is true.

So stop for a second.

Step outside the jar.

Look at your beliefs.

Look at your relationships.

Look at your environment.

Look at the things you're angry about.

Look at the things you're defending.

Look at the things you desperately need other people to agree with.

And ask yourself:

“When was the last time I checked whether this belief still belongs to me?”

Not:

“Who is right?”

Not:

“Which side am I on?”

But:

“Is this actually useful for the life I want to create?”

Because maybe the most rebellious thing you can do today…

is think for yourself.

Not against them.

Not for them.

For you. Forward.